Sometimes i cannot tell the difference between what I want to see and what I am really seeing. Its kinda a funny thing, it might sound stupid to you, but one day when you experience it then you will find out at the end its not so funny after all.

I really cannot tell between its disintegrating thoughts and mine, that I live through the pain of it unraveling itself in my mind. All for what? I do ask myself that question from time to time.

Haha, now to my fellow readers XD I know that I don't update it daily, so I try to compile every thing into 1 post. Sorry if its too long. :x

Ok lah these few days are not the best but neither the worst, although i can tell you that really if yo really piss me off within these few days you wont see the nice side of me. Have you ever really seen the angry side of me? Highy doubt it. Give you bucs if you did. But only 3 ppl can claim the prize money i wont say who. But if you think you are 1 of them come and find me 8).

Anyway to all the 2e5 ppl I have a warning for you. I thin I might not be able to make it for the BBQ because of NCC. But if I can't make it then i think you all just pretend that I am sitting there in the corner watching. Because I will miss you guys like crap. Just have fun, me and ken already made alot of prep for the BBQ already hope you guys can turn up 8).

Ok to all the ppl whose day was turned bad because of me, I'm really sorry, I don't know what to say anymore 8( I just hope that you guys can continue.


OK LAST PART OF ENTRY!!! I WILL PAY 15 BUCS TO THE PERSON WHO CAN TELL ME THE 3 HIDDEN MESSAGES INSIDE THIS ( IGNORE ALL THE CRAP )


Clearly, the feeling of dread, the feeling of envy the feeling of losing something you once held so dearly to yourself, and then lose it all within the twinkling of the eye.the feeling that there is nothing left in life but to live it.

lots of people might tell you it is best that you move on. That life is not how you stumble, but how you pick yourself and subject yourself to the fact the you may fall again.

Are you asking yourself the question,"So what?" so what you do and feel in life is what you make of it. Life isn't short,you can only compare yourself relative to the amount of time that you have left. You can choose, to remain fallen, or you can get on your feet and stand the chance to fall and go through the painful process all over again.

"Receiving to give" ever heard of it?

I know that both resolutions are not nice, but what is to be done with what littletime or resource that you have left, must be. But I must remind you that it is an undeniable and may i say fundimental fact of life that when faced with that decision evey alternative is preferable.

Catch, THERE IS NO ALTERNATIVE.

Especially while the law has many penalties for the atrcities that we inflict on others, but there are no punishments for the terrors that we inflict on ourselves in return. Is it fair or is it a product of man's natural and irresistible sense of pride. That he is always doing the 'right thing". i know that some of you might feel that this is a complete waste of time, but the fact is that yor are still reading this sentence already says something. I will leave when my time is up, but before that i will leave you with two words. Good Luck.